


No One Knew Me Then I Saw You

by Unicornsfartglitter



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Fluff, Love, M/M, Sad Daryl, Self Harm, hurting Daryl
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-02
Updated: 2018-05-02
Packaged: 2019-05-01 01:36:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14509638
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Unicornsfartglitter/pseuds/Unicornsfartglitter
Summary: Daryl’s used to the burden of life and not being known. Someone sees him though ugliness and all.





	No One Knew Me Then I Saw You

Everyday hurt a little more digging in like a dull butter knife, I knew it was cutting in but not that bad until the world ended. Everyone had someone but me. This new guy Rick shows up and automatically has a family. Merle who wasn’t there for me as it was gets lost and I’m alone in every way.

Rick’s lithe body is like a masterpiece belonging in a museum, it's wrong to look at him that way but still it happens. The man becomes my friend all smiles and chats. Not long and he is my best friend but that small knife still digs in taunting me that I’m nothing and have no one. Our family grows, Woodbury added to our group and they praise me like a Pagan God for providing. The women touch my arms and giggle as they brush hair from their faces but it’s not real. No one knows my thoughts, how I feel. The stubborn way I won’t give up though I want to, not to succumb to death but to be freed of my thoughts.

Mele dies. Poetic that a racist selfish man who hurt all his life gives to Michonne in the end. I tell no one that I hate him for that, giving his life for a stranger. Being without Merle is much like being with him, I’m still alone.

Rick still smiles and stares, jokes which isn’t usual for him. It’s beautiful and the knife pulls away, my skin healing though still bleeding. I don’t hurt as much and I wonder if maybe I got lucky. “Everyone has a soulmate Daryl.” My ma’s voice reminds me. Rick’s straight I tell myself but the pats get friendlier and linger longer. Nightmares don’t wake me at night of beatings and being alone in every way.

The knife reawakens from it’s slumber so sharp to my heart that I can hardly breath. Rick my best friend is with Michonne, the woman who took my brother. I should have known better. The cigarette burns escape to small cuts reflecting my nasty stabs, the blood though small is calming and I can breath. Beth kind of got me and she’s gone too. Everyone is happy living in perfect houses with cozy conditions I never had before. My pain and cuts, the way I want to run outside the gate or drop to the floor and finally cry until my throat breaks are not noticed. It would surprise me more if they were.

We lose more, Carl dies. Rick makes some mistakes and I love him but see we weren’t a good match anyway. Eugene is a traitor and I never liked the little bitch but he gets me, helping us in the end. I still wonder if it was authentic or him saving his own ass. Yeah, he was saving his ass. The community grows, windmills and water towers. The animals help, I can talk to them about anything with no judgement, my scarred and still ignored hands petting their fur. I still like people and hate people but Judith is my favorite because she can’t be like us vile creatures just yet.

Killing is easy, taking out the enemies. I sleep at night despite it. The nightmares only forming from my past before walkers. The world is ugly, always will be ugly I guess.

Alpha is a new breed, Sadistic as fuck. I want to scream and cry when Rick let’s Negan out to help. The war isn’t as long but still grueling, it takes away from my cuts. The killing and barely sleeping two hours of night quells my need to ache. Negan is different I think, no I know. The man still makes quips but he’s thoughtful and never harsh with me, he’s a good man now but still goes after Maggie sometimes despite him killing Glenn but with me he looks with content.

Negan’s hand touches mine, traces down my arm. There's no judgement or stupid question why, the fingers just pushing my sleeve upmore to see it all. His eyes are still brown and warm when they look up into mine, his full lips smiling like nothings wrong. I like to think nothing is. 

We’re on a run together and a walker runs into me, in the struggle we fall as my knife slips away. The weapon tearing through its mouth covering me in walker goo, it takes me a minute to realize the stabs keep coming. “Enough Negan!” My voice draws him out and he pushes the walker off pulling me to my feet with no effort to access me. “No bites.” At that relief floods Negan, his face saying it all. For the first time I feel my life really matters and if I died I would be lost. It’s not enduring but scary but I was never one to run.

Maggie moves on, has another child. Her and Michonne have babies due within a month of each other. My cutting is long forgotten and much of my pain with it. It’s easier to accept new people into Alexandria and I smile because I want to. Still no one knows me, how I feel, what makes me hurt and it’s nothing of this world.

One of those stupid parties are going on tonight, a tradition Aaron insists on. I make my small appearance wearing my one nice charcoal gray dress shirt and jeans with no holes. It’s easy to walk out, no one ever notices. Cracking open a beer I sit on the couch and close my eyes almost drifting off to sleep when footsteps have me wide awake.

Negan laughs. “I’ll never get the drop on you.”

“Nope. What are you doing here?”

“Babysitting.”

That’s a thing too, Negan gets to keep Michonne's child. I thought Carol was doing that tonight. Standing to get Negan a beer his breath hitches as he takes me in. In mind and I want to say “What the hell?” But I already know why he’s acting this way, his eyes travel up my body devouring each square inch of my tighter fitting clothes. “You're gorgeous.”

I don’t blush or run, my mind and body at peace, working in slow motion at the revelation that this man knows me, see’s the real me. The hand on my cheek is softer than it should be holding me like glass. Staring into Negan’s eyes it’s love that snuck up on me.

“Can I kiss you?”

The question is all I need to know I am right in feeling this way. “Please.” I beg.

The kiss isn’t fireworks or what you see in the movies, it’s slow and sweet guiding me along until I press my tongue back. Negan’s mouth is plush and minty clean like he planned it all along, he probably did. When he pulls back he grins but it’s a smile only made for me. I hold his hand, it laces with mine a perfect match. Air doesn’t leave my lungs as I discover my gaping open wound isn’t stitched up but removed like it never existed. Just the awe of knowing the first time I saw Negan he already knew me.


End file.
